Welcome back, everybody. If you haven't gotten caught up yet, issues one
are still available for you to bask in their flamboyant chaos. And, for the record, I'm going to be making plenty of cracks
about any and all gay subtexts, due to the fact that
I'm pansexual, and many other people are seriously seeing
the subtext too. The following line comes from my friend Tawashi Bus Hat
, my biggest supporter of the NOW! Comics reviews, and the one person able to describe the Gigantor series in less than ten
"Seriously, it's like reading Gravitation...but with robots."
So, what's our cover image today? It's nothing too wild, aside from how someone who signs his art in
the middle of the page is doing covers in lieu of WIGHT. This guy is Ted Nomura, a Japanese-American guy who actually
saw Tetsujin 28's original 1963 version on air in Japan, which is kinda cool. The title page inside, however, turns the Uncomfortable
Meter up to eleven.
That credit box is covering up unmentionable horror.
So, let me get this straight...Iron Ox is standing right behind Gigantor, lower body tilted suspiciously
close to Gigantor's back end. In the meantime, Jimmy is frustatedly watching two knobbed rods shoot white, blobby beams. Am
I the only one who didn't look at this and see it as the most horrifying robot porn ever?
Shotaro Kaneda would kick this kid's ass if
he found out how he treats his control box.
Taking up right where issue three ended, Inspector Blooper and Jimmy rush to Jimmy's house, go into the
basement and get the control box. Oddly enough, why is the control box in an unlocked basement amidst 1980's TV station equipment?
And is there any way I can tell Ben Dunn that Jimmy's holding the control box wrong?! The dials are supposed to be facing
him so he can quickly adjust the settings.
And for all you shotacons out there, Jimmy's ass.
So, Gigantor flies out of a warehouse nearby, but Jimmy notices Gigantor's not flying the same way and seems
to be covered in dirt. Blooper urges him to forget it so they can go catch the ferry, but that means this scene probably took
over half an hour in real time. Strangely, Iron Ox has been standing by the U.N. and doing nothing the whole time. Also, we're
over a third of the way into the comic already.
The faces of justice. We're all screwed.
Pop quiz...you've got control of a giant robot, and at the moment, you're about to battle with another robot.
The battle takes place by an international building in a densely-populated area. Do you...
Lead the other robot up into the sky, preferably over the nearby body of water, and engage in battle?
Immediately start fighting on the ground?
Which of these would prevent unnecessary casualities? Jimmy decides to screw thinking about it, resulting
in Iron Ox throwing Gigantor onto a line of parked cars, resulting in a large fire. Jimmy can't get full control of Gigantor,
while Blooper and a newly-present Brilliant simply urge him not to suck at piloting.
Look at all the scared little people running out of the way. What kind of building is Gigantor being
thrown into? How many people were in it? This scene is disturbing, maybe because I'm taking this in with my post-911 brain,
but maybe mostly because it's not like Gigantor couldn't have led Ox to a less densely-populated area. Brilliant starts doing
it on the next page, so all these people died for nothing.
"Or Jimmy, you could shut up, because I'm a motherfucking scientist and you just killed a dozen
As the National Guard gets called in behind him, Dr. Brilliant gets a weird feeling, so he takes the control
box and finally gets Gigantor far off the ground. As he brings Ox and Gigantor in flight towards each other, Jimmy says, "I
hope you know what you're doing, professor..."
And then he didn't know what he was doing. The end!
Oh wait, there's three more pages.
I only used this picture because I kinda like Brilliant's fabulous all-blue suit.
As chunks of Gigantor shower over the streets and the bay, Brilliant declares that the real Gigantor
is made out of a special alloy that should have survived an impact like that. So Gigantor's been stolen and replaced by a
copy, and the three stand by a pile of burning ruins while they decide they need to find the true Gigantor right away. So
hundreds of people died for nothing. Huzzah!
Also, I'd make a badge for Pillars the Magnificent Ten Stood On In Episode Six, but that would
We then cut to an ever-smoking Count Alberto and his cone-headed assistant Number One watching Iron Ox retreat,
while saying the worst chunk of dialogue in this half of the series. Alberto realizes the plan to destroy Gigantor
worked out too easily, and it dawns on him that this is the guy responsible...
"I AM STORING SWEETS AND METH IN MY SADDLEBAGS!"
Behold General Spider, also known as Count Alberto's younger brother, who's got the actual Gigantor in his
base on the moon. I know it sounds like I'm writing this on LSD, but really, this is how the issue ends.
The next issue is titled "Spider's Moon", which is weird since he already got his name in the title of this
issue, and he was in two panels.
That's the whole issue, and I'm actually really disappointed. It wasn't crazily action-packed, there wasn't
any ambient gay, and there weren't any Giant Robo character cameos. That's what really makes this comic entertaining to anybody
who's not a mecha enthusiast. About five minutes of real-time action was stretched into sixteen pages, and regardless of the
colourful art, it just feels like a cop-out.
I mean, I can't even make a witty remark about how Brilliant's jacket changed from being blue to white.
Go back and compare pictures; at least it'll give you something to do.
CLICK ON TED NOMURA'S CUTE-ASS PICTURE OF SHOTARO TO GO BACK TO THE MAIN PAGE